​God’s timing and providence always continue to amaze me. When I am caught in the day-to-day busyness of raising three children, I seem to forget He has a plan and is actively working in my life. But every so often, He comes along and “whack!” hits me right across the face with a not-so-subtle loving reminder He is there…

Embarrassingly, it has been almost a year since my last blog post for Joyful Little Catholics and honestly, there is no good excuse other than I chose to do other things with my time, some of which were productive, others weren’t. But now, I can’t help but start back up and share all the good news that we have going on and how God is working.

​I remember the first time I realized that part of teaching my children was going to include teaching them how to converse. My oldest daughter was just starting to try to have conversations with us at the dinner table each night. At first, it started with her just talking over us. Then after telling her she should ask questions, it switched to a single question over and over, “What did you do yesterday?” Why yesterday and why always the same question? I still don’t know. However, in that moment I realized that we would have to coach her a bit in having a conversation. If prayer is a conversation with God, we will have to coach our kids in the same way...

​Over time, our daughter grew into her own conversation style. We taught her what kind of questions to ask, how to listen, and how to share what was on her mind. Once she had an idea of a structure of how to talk to someone, she took it and made it her own. We should do the same thing with our children and prayer, or else they will fumble through it themselves for far longer than they need to, possibly saying the same thing over and over.

I have found the simplest structure that works with our kids (and myself) comes from using the acronym A.C.T.S. I in no way came up with this, but learned it when I was a teenager and have heard it countless places since. The acronym stands for A (Adoration) C (Contrition) T (Thanksgiving) S (Supplication). Let’s break them each down.

Adoration: Spend time telling God you love Him, this can be very short or can involve extended time of just sitting in God’s presence as you begin prayer. This is often a great place to include words of praise to God. For me with our kids, this is where I start our prayer time in the morning. I tell the kids to tell Jesus they love Him and I model it for them. I will pray something like “God I love you, help me to love you more.” It is always amazing to hear my little ones put this into their own words, often including phrases like, “I love you to the end of the Universe and back.” I find it great to start with Adoration because we are intentionally focusing on God first rather than ourselves and our own wants and needs.

Contrition: Take time to recall things you have done to hurt your relationship with God and others since your last time of prayer, and then ask for forgiveness. Naturally, after adoring God it makes sense to mend anything that is hurting your relationship with Him. Although children typically might not receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation until they are slightly older, even young children can recognize some choices they have made that were bad. When we reach this part of our prayer, it typically consists of them thinking about what things they got in trouble for, mostly fighting with each other and not listening. This step can help children to also realize that their bad choices not only hurt others but hurt God too.

Thanksgiving: This is one of my favorite parts to hear from my children. We go around and say what we are thankful for, being sure to recognize them as gifts from God and give the thanks where it is due. Again, focusing on God’s goodness before our own needs is a great example to set. I have heard things as profound as being thankful for Jesus’ love so we can be in Heaven and as silly as for rainbow unicorns. It is truly a peek into the minds and hearts of our children and I know it brings a smile to the face of our Heavenly Father.
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Supplication: Finally, after everything else, we come to the place where most of us who stumbled through learning prayer alone often begin: asking for help for ourselves and others. By saving this for last, we are teaching our children not to converse like someone focused only on getting what they want. When leading our children in this part of prayer I simply ask them what they want to ask Jesus’ help with, for themselves and others. Again, if you want a look into your child’s mind, get ready. Sometimes they will pray for “mommy’s headache” (which may have happened a week ago but is still on their mind) or for “the person that siren was going to help yesterday.” As with all the other steps, I often will go first to model it for them and help give ideas when they are learning for the first time.

Now that you have the structure, I encourage you to give it a try with your children. Model it for them and show them how you can pray in this way. Don’t worry about being perfect, as I said in our last blog on prayer, your imperfection is actually a gift that shows your children their prayer doesn’t need the perfect words and can be as natural as a normal conversation.

Also, remember to be patient with your children. They will learn reverence and appropriate posture in prayer in time. They are children and will have trouble sitting still at first and not being silly with prayers. God finds joy in your children being children. He is a Father and created them that way. We shouldn’t expect their prayer to look like the prayer of adults, but rather should try to step back and let their way of praying put a smile on our face too. Lastly, don’t forget to encourage them as they pray. Tell them you are proud of them, like how you are proud of how they thought of someone else when asking for God’s help. We often don’t realize how much of an impact these moments of encouragement have on our children.
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So, go and get started. Pick a regular time after having set your initial foundation of prayer and teach your children to have these conversations with God. Start with a short amount of time at first – try 5 minutes. If you are anxious, that is okay. You likely recognize the importance of this for your child and are worried about “getting it wrong.” Just trust the Lord and let the Holy Spirit guide you. He made you the spiritual head of your children so He will equip you.

We hear about prayer in our churches all the time. We hear our priests preach about its importance. We hear reminders to pray regularly. We hear invitations to communal prayer opportunities within our parish setting. We are encouraged to come and pray in front of the Blessed Sacrament. However, amidst all of this talk of prayer, many find themselves asking questions like, “what exactly is prayer” and even more importantly as parents, “how do you teach a child to pray.”

It is normal to find ourselves simultaneously familiar with and yet feeling unequipped and uninformed when it comes to prayer. We are raised being told to “pray”, but often aren’t taught what a full, deep, and personal prayer life is and how to have one. If you are like me, you have stumbled through it at times and still have room to learn. If you are like me, you also want more for your children. So, here are 5 steps for forming a foundation of prayer in your kids. I have learned some of these from trial and error and some from the wisdom of others in my life. Hopefully, you find them fruitful for you and your family too.

​So try out these 5 steps and remember that as long as you are trying to grow in prayer and form your children into Joyful Little Catholics that pray, God will give you the graces you need. You don’t need to be perfect and by setting this foundation, your children will find prayer to be a comfort and joy as they grow older. 

Our newest book is finally here…and what and adventure it has been! In what I have found to be a continual trend with God in my life (and in particular with our business), God has reminded me that He is in charge and has given me an opportunity to trust in Him and not myself. And now through it all I can joyfully say, My First Church Tour is now available to purchase! Preorders have gone out today and orders are now live! So what is this adventure that we experienced? Let me take you back just over 2 weeks ago…

It was a Wednesday and I had just received word from our printer that the books were printed and they had sent a sample copy for final approval that would arrive the next day. All that was left was to sign off on the sample and the full shipment would be shortly behind. Everything was going as planned, then came the snow. The sample was delayed 3 days, but that wasn’t the end of it. After the sample finally arrived and the full shipment was on its way, the snow came again and the books were delayed by another 4 days. It finally seemed like things were on track, but then came the last thing I expected. The day before the books were to arrive I tested positive for COVID. Needless to say, things were again put on hold for another 10 days (we were blessed to have wonderful family receive our all our books on our behalf while we quarantined).I was blessed to have a mild case and for everyone else in the house to stay healthy. But when it was all said and done things were delayed for over 2 weeks which brings us to today.

But God’s timing is always better than our own (I have to remind myself of this regularly). Our first book, My First Catholic Words (order here), was delayed months when the pandemic began, but God had a plan, launching My First Catholic Words on the Feast of the Sacred Heart (our company logo). This time, we are not launching at the beginning of Lent as expected, but rather on March 1st, the beginning of the month dedicated to St. Joseph, in the year dedicated to St. Joseph. As a father, trying to witness my faith to my kids, building a company to strengthen other families, I can’t think of a better intercessor for this second endeavor for Joyful Little Catholics.

​The applesauce might not have really hit the fan, but looking at our kitchen floor, you would have thought it had. Earlier that day I had posted my previous blog on 3 Tips for Finding Joy in Family Life, and I had been thinking of a way to share practical examples of how the three tips can be lived out. Suddenly God had given me a perfect opportunity with a floor covered in applesauce.

It was lunchtime, and I had posted my most recent blog barely an hour early. After posting it, I felt like I had not provided enough examples of what it looked like to practically live out a joy-filled life. I had been tossing the idea around in my head and wasn’t really sure what I should share. I should have known better. I should have known that as I was trying to think of examples, God would give me an opportunity to practice it right then.

Our oldest daughter (5) had just finished eating everything she had initially been given for lunch and was looking through the fridge for more food. She asked for some applesauce, so I grabbed the jar and filled up a bowl for her. After filling the bowl, I turned to carry it to the table. Right as I turned it happened, as if it was slow motion and super-speed all at once. I saw every detail clearly, but could not move quickly enough to stop it. My daughter (5) jumped up and threw her hands up in the air in surprise at the perfect time to smack the bowl of applesauce out of my and all over the kitchen. Before I knew it, I reacted, shouting, “What the heck are you doing?” I hadn’t realized it, but she was trying to entertain her youngest sister (10mon) from across the room with a game of peekaboo.  In that moment, God immediately reminded me of my own advice to Pray, Recall My Vocation, and Be Intentional. Yelling at my child for an accident was not the best response. So, I paused and decided to take my own advice.

1) Pray, Pray Pray: I started with a prayer. I asked God to calm my frustrations and help me respond in an appropriate way. I asked him to give me the grace to be honest with my daughter, both with my frustrations and with my own faults. And wouldn’t you know it…God provided.

2) Recall Your Vocation: I then briefly recalled my mission to form my children into saints. I knew that modeling yelling when I was frustrated did not necessarily meet that end. So, I thought about what virtues I did want to foster in them. I wanted them to learn to apologize when they did something wrong, whether on purpose or not, and I wanted them to learn to be patient with others’ mistakes.

3) Be Intentional: Lastly, I took those goals and changed my attitude and response to reflect that purpose. I calmed my voice and apologized for shouting. I explained why I was frustrated and told my daughter that she needed to be more aware of what was going on around her, but I also recognized it was an accident. I praised her for the positive action of trying to entertain her sister. I asked her to apologize and to learn from her mistake. We were even blessed with a short car ride to preschool, just the two of us, shortly after and were able to go into it all in more depth. Looking back, I was glad God helped give me a wakeup call and opportunity to change in the moment.
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It is so easy to let our natural frustrations control our response with our kids. I have done it countless times, but we can be better. Our feelings don’t have to define our reactions. Through the grace of God, we can respond in virtue and with more intentionality as we build up a family of saints, and it can be as simple as 3 steps. 

​Life can be crazy! As I try to sit down and write this blog for what feels like the tenth time, I have a 9 month old crying at my feet to be held, a 3 year old asking for help with toys, a 5 year old calling down from upstairs that she doesn’t want to go potty and brush her teeth alone, and to top it off a random beeping somewhere in the house that is driving me insane. The vocation of a parent can be a challenge to say the least, yet in it all, we are called to be JOYFUL.

3) Be Intentional
The third and final suggestion is to be intentional. We do not become saints by accident. Nor do our children or spouses. The joy that comes from living in line with God’s will takes our intentional choice. The easiest way I have found to start is by simply choosing one thing each day to serve and love your children and spouse. We grow from there until our whole life is an intentional act. If you are like me, being intentional can be tiring. It takes planning and lots of energy, but it is much less tiring than the emotional drain from lack of motion. If you are looking to form a more long-term plan, journal your dreams of what you want for you family (try including God and making it part of your prayer time). Mine includes my children having a love for prayer in adoration, frequenting Mass, being in love with their faith, and following the example of the saints. After you have defined the dream, gradually do one thing at a time to get closer to that dream. For me, it started with a weekly trip with my kids to the Adoration chapel (I often use one of our books to teach them while we are there, get yours here). That has since grown into a short daily prayer time together right after breakfast to teach them personal prayer, and a story about a saint at bedtime. Trying to force our dreams and do everything at once never works, trust me I have tried and become discouraged more times than I can count. Forming saints is a process, just as God has worked on each of us and continues to throughout our lives; we too can gradually form our families and ourselves. Just remember to be intentional. It won’t always go like we plan and that is okay. We only lose the battle when we stop trying, so be intentional and remember, we do not become saints by accident.

Now go out and begin, through the grace of God. Pray, Recall your Vocation, and Be Intentional. Reclaim the joy that God is calling you to.

I never planned to start a business; in fact, I was more than content with the way things were. Three years ago, I was working a job that I loved, serving God through my home parish. But then God spoke. His voice came in many ways that were both gradual and persistent. After a period of discernment, it was clear that God had a new plan for me.

My wife had received a job offer that, if accepted, would result in her going back to work full-time and possibly traveling up to 20% of the time. I couldn’t see a way that this would work with my ministry schedule that included nights and weekends. I was sure God would have a different job out there for her and that, if we prayed about it, it would become clear. How could He not? There was no way this could work. God is always full of surprises though. By the time we were done praying together as a couple, I was convinced that she was meant to accept the job. Then it hit me, if she was meant to accept this job, maybe God was asking me to make a change too. So back to prayer I went. The next week I was taking our youth ministry to a youth conference and I had a lot of time to pray. During an evening of Exposition God affirmed that He was asking me to leave my job and “take a leap,” trusting in Him. Through further prayer over the subsequent weeks, I got the sense that God had other plans for me, to live out the call to evangelization in a new way, but just what that was supposed to look like was unclear.
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So what next? I left my job. I spent the next year, searching for a different job, expecting God to work in the way I would have chosen. Door after door was closed. During that time, I remembered a project I had been working on for my kids, a board book to help them learn their “first Catholic words.” This had been a project almost 2 years in the works, and for quite a while, I had been talking about the idea of possibly self-publishing it, but that had always just been a pipedream. God began to make it clear that this was part of the new way he wanted me to evangelize. So then, I…did nothing. I waited 6 months to take action. I let fear control me. I had been willing to leave my job, but there was little risk there. We could survive on my wife’s salary. With this, however, I would be entering an area I knew little about. I would be putting something I made out there for the world and they might not like it. I would be spending our own savings. It was scary and although I often spoke of trust in God, I let fear win.

Fortunately for me, God is patient. He knows our weaknesses and failings and will never give up on us. He continued to work on my heart for the next 6 months until I was ready. He quieted my fears and replaced them with excitement. I moved from a place of anxiety to joy. The funny thing is that when I decided to say yes, He blessed me beyond measure. As I finally started our business and sent our book to print, I had plenty of reasons to be anxious. My wife was 7 months pregnant with our third daughter. Days after approving the proofs for print, the printer was shut down for an indefinite amount of time due to COVID. Everything was unsure, I had little idea what I was doing, and yet there was peace.

​Since then God has put our books in the hands of over 500 families. He has given us the ability to print a second book, and has inspired ideas for multiple more books (shameless plug, click here to pre-order our newest book). He has continually reaffirmed the decision to say yes. His call and gifts were not what I would have planned, they are better.

​Our mission has always been about more than just providing books (available here). We support families with books, parent resources, and prayer. Until this point, the parent resources have been solely parent guides for our books and coloring pages to help engage your children more. Now our blog will continue to build on that goal of helping parents by engaging in topics of raising children to be saints and being models for our children. 

I do not claim to be an expert in all the areas that I will write about on this blog. Rather, I hope to write from a place of humility as a fellow parent, running the race, fighting the fight, striving to get my family to Heaven. I am far from perfect, I fail regularly, and I get frustrated and yell more often than I care to admit. Yet through the grace of God, I continue to learn from these experiences. So, I will share with you my experience and wisdom God has granted me in my journey in hopes that some of it may help you and encourage you in your own journeys. We are all in this together. 

I pray that this will be useful for all who read it and an added resource to parents out there striving to bring joy and faith into their homes. The goal is to post regularly, but we all know as parents life can get in the way, so I pray that God uses this blog in His timing and wisdom to carry out His purposes and not mine. If you ever have ideas for the blog feel free to comment and let us know what you want to hear about. Check back soon for the first "real" blog post. God Bless.